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Thursday, January 09, 2014

I Can't Sleep

It is after midnight and I can't sleep.  I tried to log into my blog to write this, but Shani Hubbard Tennant knows that access better than me.  Because of circumstances being what they are, I cannot ask her about it.  So, I use this forum to write tonight as my mind has a lot running through it...especially after seeing a photo of what is left of the family car and counting the blessings of my wife and two-year-old who survived the crunch.

Some of those blessings came from 49+ individuals and the numbers keep growing.  When the accident happened, I had the hardest time of getting a hold of anyone outside of my mom, Cheryl, and grandma, Carolyn, because I have not made that much of an effort to keep other phone numbers of family, especially on my wife's side.
 
I finally decided to change my status to mention something in hopes that I might get a hold of family some way and that is when the blessings began to pour in.  The blessings came in comments of some 49+ individuals who saw my status and responded.  To some, 49+ might not seem like a lot, but to me that was more than what I had dreamed of when I changed my status.
 
Thank you 49+ for the comments, prayers, and thoughts made.  Because of your efforts, I cannot help but think that the continued miracles are and will continue to come throughout the night, week, and months that my wife and family will need with this experience.

Then there are the miracles of my wife and daughter.  How did they survive?  How did they not come out worse than what they did?  My daughter came out of the wreck with not a scratch on her and that is NOT the first time something like this has happened.  If you go to my blog (kstennant.blogspot.com), you will read the story of my 1 1/2  year-old daughter surviving a head dive off of a trampoline onto a concrete slab with not a scratch on her from landing.  In fact, she didn't cry because of the fall...she cried because of the fear on my face when I found her after watching her go over the edge.

Then my wife.  Yes, she needed to have surgery tonight for compressed vertebrae that could have lead to nerve damage, paralysis, and/or broken neck.  He leg also got pinched, but there are no other broken bones.  Now for the moment, that is not a comfort for her because she is recovering from surgery and the next few days she will be in a lot of pain.  However, when you look at the picture's, there is no other damage to her and I cannot help but ask how?

Well, I have an answer and it is more a personal belief than a factual answer because it depends upon if you believe in life after death and I do.  For that reason, I know that angels where guarding my wife and daughter.  There is at least a father, two grandfathers, and a daughter/sister that had to have been there, but I won't limit it to those guardian angels as I will admit that many more could have been there.

To those guardian angels I say thank you!  How much I do miss you and still wish you were alive and here, but the protection and influence that they have had on my family’s life goes beyond just life.  They fill a vital role to the successful raising of my family and I acknowledge their existence, influence, and protection over my family.

Finally, I wish my wife could read this.  In the coming days there will be a lot of what could have been done different to avoid the situation and yes when I saw the weather this morning, I had my doubts about her going.  However, my wife had a desire and it is that desire that I love the most about my wife.  She wants to help.  She wants to do good to everyone and this time, she wanted to do good to her sister, Sam, and sister-in-law, Melissa, who just recently had babies.  She wanted to bring them bread and see the new additions to the family.  She figured if she did it during the week, she would only have Lizzie to take instead of all of the kids.  So, she went...or at least made an effort to go.  A lot would not have done that, but that is what defines Shani's character.  When she sets her mind to it, she does it and I cannot fault her for having such a great desire.

This tragedy could have happened to anyone.  I could spend a lot of time asking why, but in the end it doesn't matter as much as what am I going to do about it.  This is a time for me to serve my wife greater!  This is a time for my kids to serve my wife greater!  This is a time for others to serve my family greater!  And maybe this is the reason that it has happened.

It is a time to serve in whatever capacity people can serve.  I have already mentioned how many have helped already and I am sure in the coming days I will see more of it.  I do not have time to live with what if's and if only's and that is how I want to end this posting knowing that I will have a crazy rest of the week ahead.  I cannot help but for the moment feel overwhelmed, but I do know that in Christ, my family and  I can survive...even if it is one day at a time.

Now I think that I am ready to sleep...the time is approaching 1 AM and I need to get some rest before returning to my beloved in a little while.  She wants me by her side and I will be there all the way to the end...I LOVE YOU SHANI HUBBARD TENNANT...may I always have the grace of your presence during this life and into the eternities...good night all!

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